I am a mother of 2 boys, one is turning 13 and the youngest is turning 5. I’m a work at home momma usually 5 days a week when I’ve met the deadlines and sometimes for a whole week when things are picking up with clients in different parts of the world. I take care of the kids and of course, the husband, as well as managing the house.
Most of the time, things at home are pretty rough more so when it’s a weekend because kids are always fighting, shouting, running, dribbling, crying and a lot more annoying things they do. I need to concentrate on writing and building templates for several clients’ websites, and when there’s chaos, my life is spinning endlessly. There are times that I’m close to tears but suppressing it because I know that I’m going to get mad after crying.
So, I thought of a solution to the problem – I give in. Yeah, parents sometimes just agree on something their kids are telling them or doing just to pacify their troubled minds. I mean, that made them settle down but that doesn’t mean it’s all right. Not every thing is right and should be all right, you get what I mean? At times, they want to eat chocolate cookies and eating loads of that will make their throats itchy pending an incoming sore throat then a cough. I do let them eat those sometimes but even when working and my head buried in writing, I still make it a point not to allow them eat so much. Because eventually, when they become sick, I won’t be able to work and I’d be up to my neck with pending tasks.
It’s such a cutie when my kids come up to me saying sweet and nice things like – “Mom, you are so beautiful today!” or “I love you so much, Mamu!” or “Can I massage your feet so you can be relaxed?”, and so much more bribes, lol.
Here’s what happens when my 5 year doesn’t get his way:
- He throws his toys and hammers them down on the floor
- He cries a lot and not just that, you can bet the neighbors can hear it all
- He shouts at the top of his lungs
- He won’t talk to me unless he urgently needs to go to the bathroom
- He will do exactly what I don’t like
Here’s the thing, sometimes giving in does the trick. I’d call him to my side with soothing words and arms open wide, he’ll still cry but comes to me running. Then, he will repeat whatever he wants and I’d willingly agree. He’ll stop crying, get whatever that is and will show me with a grin. He’s naughty, I know, but he’s a kid and still learning right from wrong and it’s up to me and his dad to teach him. I don’t get easily mad at him but getting annoyed is what I need to work on.
I know that there are times when my kids are manipulating me. They can’t get thru their dad, so they do it with me, simply because I’m at home all the time and dad is at work. It is so frustrating when giving in is all that I can do. It’s not because I just want to get back to work, but because the situation will go on the next level, which is a tantrum, and that would make things worst.
I love and adore my kids and it’s really difficult for a work at home mom to get things done without a fight. So, answer this question please coz I really wanna know if there are other things I can do besides conceding – How do you deal with manipulating kids?